We’re not talking about this enough. It’s more dangerous than we know. Everyone walks around with a huge smile on their face as this silent epidemic haunts them and places them in that dark box. We are scared to be vulnerable about this topic because we don’t want to be deemed a certain way. Some are too broken to take a look at their strangers or neighbors in misery. In that situation, we box it all up, allowing Social Media to strengthen the power of this disease in us. As it gains power over us, we’re almost hopeless; we’re almost dehumanized; and we’re almost dead. Per such feelings, no one knows; no one can tell; sadly, no one will ever know; and no one will ever tell. To each person our tents as we drown in this disease – loneliness. The worst part? We don’t talk about this enough.
As college students, our age demographics tend to experience this disease more than others. According to Cross River Therapy, “people ranging in age from 16 to 24 report feeling lonelier than their older counterparts. More than 10 percent of this age bracket say they are lonely on a regular or daily basis” (Zauderer, 2023). Sadly, roughly 11,680 of us students go to USM. More specifically, “43% of people ages 18 to 25 report feeling unloved; 73% of Millennials say they are lonely; and 22% of Gen X members say they are lonely and have no friends (Zauderer 2023). In other words, this is not a Gen Z-only issue. Every generation is involved, and every individual is vulnerable to this epidemic.
In a world where we can’t be vulnerable about our unfiltered opinions on several things; we resort to social media. On campus, Yikyak has risen to the occasion – a place for everything and anything from trolling to ranting to asking questions. The best part about it? It’s anonymous. Therefore, no one knows who’s speaking sense or trash. Per these perks, Yikyak has become the home of unfiltered opinions for students. As per this platform, there has been an outcry about so many issues on Campus, and a major one being Loneliness – “Someone hang out with me tonight (a girl tired of being alone); “I hate my depression rn. It’s in full swing…”; Is it weird to feel hella lonely in a relationship?” and so many more depressing comments. It’s important to realize how deep this is for everybody. More often than not, we resort to blaming social media. However, in all transparency, I beg to refute. We all have a part to play in this; everyone has a role to play in dealing with this issue on Campus.
First and foremost, we must take accountability for our situations… A lot of us are lonely and don’t want to embrace it. Without cognizance of a problem, how can we tackle it? By embracing and realizing that we have this problem, we can definitely set out to tackle this disease. A huge part of this problem is that we have given into Social Media. A huge part of relieving ourselves of this shackle is making social media work for us. To do this, we must be cognizant of the quality and quantity of time we spend on Social Media. Social Media has been a plus for a lot of people. To make that our case, we must be intentional with our time on it, or else, we risk having it work for us, which could be deadly. Spend more time in real life doing more real-life things rather than through the screens of your phone. This is a huge step toward escaping the rabbit hole of loneliness.
Most importantly, the idea of loneliness stems from lacking in one of three types of relationships: “Intimate, Relational, and Collective.” When we lack one of these relationships, we tend to feel lonely. In such a situation, the biggest remedy for every disease comes in handy: ACTION. We have to get out there and be outside. Staying in your room 24/7 isn’t going to help out. Complaining about Yikyak will solve almost nothing. Except you’re an introvert, you have to get out and meet new people. Organize meetups and interact with other beautiful people. It’s more comfortable to glue your body to the bed than to move out. Our greatest wins in life stem from embracing uncomfortability. Being comfortable with uncomfortability is one of life’s biggest cheat codes, and I’m learning it myself. Comfort is an illness in itself. Embracing that illness is the precursor for most problems like Loneliness. Pushing out of that comfort zone is the remedy. Touch some grass.
Of course, this is not a lamenting piece. This is a call to action. A huge call to action is realizing that as much as we must touch some grass, we must be a light at the end of the tunnel for others who are struggling. This is the bifocal nature of this epidemic’s remedy: Our actions shouldn’t be for ourselves only. It should involve and cater to our surroundings. It should involve being open-minded about how several people feel and being a listening ear to their issues. Loneliness will remain prevalent if we don’t look out for our neighbors: A simple compliment; a simple kind gesture; a simple listening ear. These things matter so much and could be the best thing that ever happened to someone. The best way to combat loneliness is to find a community. These little gestures of kindness are building blocks for a solemn and serene community.
Loneliness is a rising epidemic, but we are bigger than this. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Nothing lasts forever. We all have a part to play in curbing this epidemic – taking those uncomfortable steps and putting ourselves out there as well as being a light for others to work on themselves, feel positive, and take their uncomfortable actions. It’s reciprocal. We get what we give. By exuding positive energy, we attract that positive energy as well.
Recent research and surveys explain that lifespan is not necessarily dependent on our diet or the quality of our jobs. According to Harvard Health, “many studies have shown that people with good relationships have fewer health problems, are happier, and live longer” (Harvard Health, 2011). A Stanford Center on Longevity study found that the risk of death due to a lack of societal connections is approximately equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day and consuming excessive alcohol. According to Everyday Health, being lonely accelerates aging by 1.65 years. This is not to scare you but to awaken you to reality. I know it’s not easy, but nothing worth having comes easy. If nothing scares you, the above stats should push you. We’re all in this together; We rise by lifting others.
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The Bifocal Lenses of Loneliness: We’re Both The Problem
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