Dating in college: a whole new ballgame

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Courtesy Photo
Courtesy Photo

College can be the most fun, life-changing and frustrating time in one’s life. New people and new opportunities are always coming and going.

On top of the exams, projects, jobs and social activities, students are also dealing with the struggle of learning how to date in college.

George Moufarrej is a relationship expert  from California and an author of the Amazon best seller, “Sexual Euphoria: A Complete Guide for Men and Women.” Since becoming a best-selling author, Moufarrej has spent much of his time speaking to college students about relationships, sex and dating.

“You don’t have to be exclusive with someone after one date,” Moufarrej said.

He encourages students to date several people. To find the right person, one should date multiple people to find out what he or she likes.  Dating is supposed to be about having fun and finding out which person he or she has the most fun with.

Another issue students have to deal with when it comes to dating in college is sex.

“Just because the guy pays for the date doesn’t mean the woman should have to have sex with them,” Moufarrej said.

He said neither men nor women should feel the pressure of sexual expectation, especially when it comes to casual dating. With hook-up culture plaguing the nation, many feel as though sex is expected after a few dates. “One challenge is that students feel they should have sex with someone just because they have gone on a couple dates with them,” Moufarrej said. 

Whether a person has been on two dates with another person or has been in a two-year relationship, they should never feel like they have to do anything they do not want to do.

Moufarrej also said if students choose to be intimate with the person they are dating, they should be mature and safe about their decision.  They should be able to trust the other person.  Moufarrej said men should not just expect a woman is on birth control. 

He has seen cases where the woman has lied in order to get pregnant, altering the lives of both involved.

Many students on the Southern Miss campus have dealt with the struggle of dating in college.

For some students, college is the first time they have the ability to truly discover themselves.

“How are you supposed to be in a relationship if you don’t even know who you are yet?” said Erin de los Santos, a junior elementary education major.

“It was hard to find someone in the same stage of life as me,” said Meredith Barefield, a senior biochemistry major. 

One point that Moufarrej wants to make clear to students is that communication is one of the ultimate keys to a successful relationship and to successful dating in college.

“Communication with the other person keeps the relationship strong, keeps them intimate,” he said.

It’s not about finding Mr. or Mrs. Right.  Dating in college is about having fun, taking time and finding out what kind of person he or she likes. 

Once that person comes around, whether it be in the next four years or the next 10, students will be glad they took the time to date and get to know other people before settling down with “the One.”